Why There’s No Cat In Christmas

I’m sorry, but cats and Christmas just don’t mix. I know this from personal experience.

Ever have a kitten climb your Christmas tree? At night? I spent an hour the next morning looking for him before he decided to meow. Found him perched at the back of the tree up near the top, naturally.

Or have a cat swipe a glass ornament and use it for his personal toy before hiding it under the couch across the room. (I found it in March.)

And God forbid I put bows on any of the packages. I thought this one bow with pretty curling ribbons kept falling off until I caught my current cat, Vinnie, red-handed, err, pawed, with his claws snagged in the ribbon. He looked up at me as if to say, "Oh, this one wasn't for me?"

And it’s not only indoor cats you have to worry about. My outdoor cat, Miles, is celebrating his first Christmas. Imagine his joy when my son and I were stringing the lights up outside. I’m surprised we got the chore finished before dark. Now all I have to worry about is finding the light string chewed in half. I can see Miles now, orange eyes innocently wide despite every hair on his body standing on end. (Shudder)

Oh, and before I go, let’s not forget the tinsel episode. Last year I decided to put silver tinsel on the tree and had to snatch it back off when Vinnie started slurping it up like strings of spaghetti. Off course, not all of it stayed down and I had a wonderful time cleaning up after him the next few days. It was funny, though, when I went to sift the litter box and found several glittery ‘treasures’. I even invited my sons to come take a look and share in the laughter. After all, isn’t sharing what Christmas is all about?

Merry Christmas to all. Yes, even the cats.